Lauren Eden’s words— “Our bodies heal without permission, but our hearts need consent. Give it.”
— are a reminder that while physical healing happens automatically, emotional healing requires our active participation. But why is it so hard to let go? And what happens when we don’t?
Many of us hold on longer than we should, gripping tightly to past hurts, regrets, fears, and anxieties, as if letting go would somehow erase the significance of what happened. But in reality, holding on can harm us far more than whatever it is we’re afraid to release.
Why Holding On Affects Us Physically
The mind and body are deeply connected, and what we refuse to let go of emotionally manifests in our physical well-being. When we suppress emotions or dwell in a state of worry, our nervous system stays in a heightened state of stress. Over time, this stress can lead to:
Overeating or undereating: Using food as comfort or punishment, disrupting our gut health.
Overperforming or underperforming: Pushing ourselves too hard to distract from our emotions or withdrawing completely.
Headaches and muscle tension: Unresolved stress often leads to migraines and chronic pain.
Digestive issues: Anxiety can slow digestion or speed it up, leading to bloating, IBS, or ulcers.
Injuries: Overexertion from trying to “outrun” emotional pain can lead to physical breakdown.
Essentially, our bodies react to what our minds won’t release. We end up carrying emotional baggage not just in our thoughts but in our bones, muscles, and stomach.
Healing Takes Time—And More Patience Than Time
If healing were simply about time, then everyone who experiences pain would eventually feel better just by waiting it out. But time alone does not heal wounds—intention does. Healing requires patience, self-compassion, and sometimes, the willingness to try multiple approaches before finding what truly works.
One of the hardest things about healing is that there’s no one-size-fits-all strategy. Some people need movement—running, yoga, or Jiu-Jitsu—to process their emotions. Others need stillness—meditation, therapy, journaling. Some require deep conversations, while others heal best in solitude.
The point is, healing is for everybody, but the same path isn’t for everyone. The key is giving yourself permission to try, to fail, and to keep going. Because on the days it feels impossible, all you have to do is decide:
Will I hold on for one more day?
Or will I let go for one more day?
The Choice: One More Day of Holding On or Letting Go?
There will be days when holding on feels easier. Days when the pain still feels fresh, when forgiveness seems out of reach, or when the fear of what comes after letting go is too overwhelming. And that’s okay. Healing isn’t linear, and sometimes, we need to sit with our emotions a little longer before we’re ready to release them.
But then there will be days when you realize that holding on is hurting you more than whatever it is you’re afraid to let go of. That’s when the shift happens—not because time has magically erased the pain, but because you’ve chosen to step into healing.
Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting. It doesn’t mean what happened wasn’t real or that your feelings weren’t valid. It simply means you refuse to let pain define the rest of your story.
So, ask yourself:
What is holding me back from letting go?
What physical symptoms am I experiencing that could be connected to emotional stress?
What can I do today—just for today—to create space for healing?
Some days, healing looks like choosing a nourishing meal instead of numbing with junk food. Some days, it’s rolling out your yoga mat even when you don’t feel like it. Some days, it’s journaling your emotions rather than suppressing them.
Healing isn’t always grand or dramatic. Sometimes, it’s the small, quiet choices that lead to the biggest transformations.
Strategies for Letting Go
Letting go is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight, and it’s not about forcing yourself to move on before you’re ready. It’s about creating space for healing and choosing—little by little—to release what no longer serves you.
Here are some powerful strategies to help you let go:
1. Accept That You Cannot Change the Past
One of the hardest things about letting go is the desire to rewrite what happened. We replay scenarios, wishing we had acted differently or that someone else had. But the past is unchangeable. The sooner we accept this truth, the sooner we can shift our energy toward healing.
Try This: Write down what you wish had gone differently. Then, rewrite it with acceptance:
"I cannot change what happened, but I can change how I move forward."
2. Practice Emotional Release Through Movement
Our emotions are stored in the body. This is why physical activity can be a powerful tool for emotional release. Whether it’s yoga, Jiu-Jitsu, running, or even dancing in your living room, movement helps to release stuck energy.
Try This: The next time you feel overwhelmed, move. Shake out your body, go for a walk, or flow through a yoga session. Notice how your emotions shift afterward.
3. Breathe Into the Present Moment
When we hold onto past pain or future anxieties, we forget to be present. Breathwork is a simple yet effective way to ground yourself in the now.
Try This: Close your eyes and take a deep breath in for four counts, hold for four, and exhale for four. Repeat until you feel more centered.
4. Let Yourself Feel (Without Judgment)
Many of us avoid difficult emotions because we think they’ll consume us. But emotions only fester when they are ignored. Give yourself permission to feel without self-judgment.
Try This: Sit in stillness and name what you’re feeling. Say, "I am feeling sad. I am feeling frustrated. I am feeling hopeful." Observe the emotions without labeling them as good or bad.
5. Release Through Writing
Journaling can help process emotions and bring clarity. When thoughts stay in our minds, they become overwhelming. Writing them down makes them tangible—and easier to release.
Try This: Write a letter to what you need to let go of. You don’t have to send it—just the act of writing can be healing.
6. Set Boundaries with Your Own Thoughts
Sometimes, we are our own worst enemy. We replay old conversations, analyze past mistakes, and fuel our own suffering.
Try This: When you catch yourself in a negative thought spiral, say, "I am choosing not to feed this thought right now." Redirect your focus to something uplifting.
7. Forgive—Not for Them, but for You
Forgiveness isn’t about condoning what happened. It’s about freeing yourself from the weight of resentment.
Try This: Picture the person or situation you need to forgive. Imagine handing them a balloon and letting it float away. Say, "I release this for my own peace."
The Power of Small Shifts
A famous quote by Rumi says:
"Try not to resist the changes that come your way. Instead, let life live through you."
Letting go doesn’t mean forcing yourself to move on overnight. It means allowing life to move through you—to feel, to process, to breathe. Even if all you do today is take one deep breath and release just a little of what you’ve been carrying, that’s enough.
Because one day of letting go—just one day—can change everything.
Your Challenge:
For the next 24 hours, choose one small thing to let go of. Maybe it’s a thought, a worry, or the need for control. Write it down, breathe it out, and trust that you are healing, even if it’s just one breath at a time.
